TWO WEEKS. (From my journal on Thursday, May 27)

From my journal on Thursday, May 27
“Today marks 2 weeks that I have been in India. It seems like I’ve been here much longer. Maybe it is the heat of Goa- there is a heaviness and an intensity that pulls down on every limb of my body. Each drop of sweat that runs down my face and chest and back carries not only the physical weight draining from my body, but effort to understand oozing from my mind, and concern—frustration—a desire to help but not knowing how-seeping from my heart. My spirit is like a confused child, trapped inside a world that is so much more twisted, complicated, evil, hopeless, and fan-less than I ever thought. Even so, my spirit is excited by the simplest things—smiles. Smiles of slum children gathering around me to see their picture on my camera, smiles from women and children in passing on the road, smiles from the girls during the sewing classes—my spirit leaps at the smallest glimpse of hope that flutters in the dark faces around me, clutching onto any sign of joy or happiness in the eyes of women and children.

Though my heart is concerned for the men of this community, it is hardened… I have no sympathy for them, but I have a desire for them to be changed, to have the scales fall from their eyes and for them to see women as precious creations of value and worth, as equals, as needing protection but also needing to be heard.
While my heart longs to cradle and hold each little girl that walks by me in the slum, shielding her from mistreatment and wrapping her in the love of Christ, I also desire to take each little boy by the hand and teach them to respect and honor the women around them…I long for the little boy to see the little girl next to him as a partner, a teammate, a capable and beautiful jewel to be valued.

Two of the afternoons in Vasco, Steph, David, and I visited preschools in the area. After talking to the teachers, not only were we able to learn of the schools’ needs, but education carried an entirely new importance in my mind… not did the preschools prepare the 3, 4, and 5 year olds academically for entering primary school, giving them a better chance to succeed in higher education, but from just a few years of age, the children were taught virtues and values of discipline, diligence, respect, and teamwork. My hope is that as these little boys and little girls are educated together, studying side by side, that they would regard each other as equals---that when the little boys grow up, they wouldn’t beat or burn their wives, or force them to provide irrational amounts of money for the family, they wouldn’t sell their daughters to pimps for extra cash, they wouldn’t spend all the money they make on alcohol or on visits to brothels. Instead, they would honor their wives, protect and educate their children, and value the women around them… If the demand for prostitutes declines, so will the supply.

My fervent prayer is for this younger generation to be filled with a heartfelt conviction for justice, and that they would revolutionize the role of the Indian woman in society, seeing her for the beautiful and precious creation that she is.”